Why was Hitler hit with a baseball?
because he was a fucking racist, sexist and homophobic nationalistic douchebag
no because he did nazi it coming
when you get trolled:
- Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before driving back home.
- Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
- #australians: i drove for nine hours #now i'm nine hours away from home #no one is here #the streets are empty #how did this happen #where has civilisation gone #i am alone in the universe #oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
do you ever think about all of james and lily’s old school friends?? watching harry grow up through daily prophet articles and the media and knowing who he is, not because of the fame but because they knew his parents
and when the day finally came that he defeated voldemort for good, they were so proud. he didn’t know it, but they were. proud enough for lily and james, sirius and remus, and his grandparents put together
no matter how lonely and unloved harry felt growing up, he never was. there were always people out there that cared for him and were proud of him for much more than just being “the boy who lived” or “the chosen one”. they were proud and they cared because he was “harry potter, james and lily’s boy”
- Will Herondale: Bloodthirsty little beasts. Never trust a duck
- Jace Herondale: She just asked if she could touch my mango
- Jem Carstairs: Don't say you are sorry, say you'll train with me
- Tessa Gray: Are you highly intoxicated at the moment?
- Clary Fray: I figured all your classes were stuff like Slaughter 101 and Beheading for Beginners
- Magnus Bane: The only person who gets to canoodle in my bedroom is my magnificent self
- Izzy Lightwood: Is the mortal cup Jace, not the mortal toilet bowl
- Alec Lightwood: I‘m a demon hunter, clearly, I am not afraid of the dark
- Max Lightwood: Do people ever climb the demon towers? Like, for any reason?
- Simon Lewis: The nod means, 'I' am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass
- Sebastian Morgenstern: You asked me who I belong to. I belong to you
- Charlotte Branwell: if you set yourself on fire deliberately, I will institute divorce proceedings
- Henry Branwell: You love me, too, Lottie?
- Luke Garroway: Why would I have a spider? Do I look like someone who would collect them?
- Jessamine Lovelace: What’s the word for a perfectly reasonable fear of annoying idiots?
- Cecily Herondale: You know, you really didn’t have to throw that man through the window
- Sophie Collins: It's all right to love someone who doesn't love you back, as long as they're worth you loving them
- Gideon Lightwood: What if I were to ask you...
- Gabriel Lightwood: Father is a worm
Matty: “What’s your guilty pleasure, Ross? Dixie Chicks, that’s mine. ”
Ross: “I was listening to the Backstreet Boys the other night.”
Matty: “That’s not a guilty pleasure.”
George: “Just pleasure.”
Matty: “That’s just straight up pleasure.”
If you read one book a week, starting at the age of 5, and live to be 80, you will have read a grand total of 3,900 books, a little over one-tenth of 1 percent of the books currently in print.